Oh, GRACIOUS! What have I done NOW???

note: this is the first installment of a saga.

It all started innocently enough.

I needed a particular image for a little craft project and I needed it hand-drawn. I gave it my best shot- and wasn't pleased. My goodness! If I took a drawing class I might could get it at least to look half way like what it represented!

Hmmm..... maybe I should just sign up for a class?!

Uh-oh!

Somebody should have STOPPED ME!

I'm going to live to regret this! I just KNOW IT!

Since there is no local hobby store, I took myself up to the local University. To take the drawing class, I had to enroll for the course. To get enrolled, I had to be readmitted. To be readmitted meant they had to dig out my old transcript. OUCH! No- no one was injured in the registrar's office! And, the file wasn't 6-feet under like it should have been! But, it's UGLY!

Suffice it to say.... all this just to draw an ELK is over-board as usual!

I am now taking not one but TWO classes for the Summer II semester and neither are drawing! It's only offered in the Fall. Duh.

But, the classes I'm taking are fun! Well, sort-of. They might be.

WHAT??? Why AM I doing this? Oh- yeah. I remember now. The elk.

I thought to self- "Self, might be a good idea to see if you can even endure sitting through class period FIRST!".... that's when I signed up for an advanced English course on American women authors. Turns out- that's only an option for grad- students AND as it's a TBA topic during the summer and the instructor decided on African-American lit instead. UGH. Well... not exactly what I had in mind.

Back to the "drawing board" (pun intended!). Okay... I'll take one of those Mickey Mouse courses (required) and therefore mundane in my thinking. Why, OH WHY do I keep doing that??? THINKING??? You can bet trouble is looming. After reviewing the schedule- I opted for Oral Communications (3 hours) and Life Fitness Concepts (1 hour credit) thinking "this'll be a piece of cake".

OH MY LORD! I think I'm going to be sick! 'er... no... I AM SICK! Sure enough. I got so intimidated after the first class and listening to all his expectations of what all we'd have to cram into four weeks, preparing and giving speechs and taking tests that I had to excuse myself. I had fully expected (and given him notice) that my leg would dictate just how long I could sit still and might have to be allowed to "walk it off"- who knew this other (IBS) would flare?

Classic.

The original project was insignificant.... the preparation time with hurdles to conquer before even beginning to see the results will take weeks if I can endure. I'm turning into my mother AND I'm going to have to take medicine just to get through it!

I only hope it's worth it! After the fourth day- I'm finally getting "in the groove" of being a student. Even took my first exam yesterday!

This could be fun... even if I'm little scared.

Fireworks.... ala Kim & Sally!

The colors of freedom!

Red, white & blue ('er... green if you believe the photo here, haha!)!

Hope you had a lovely 4th of July!

The photo is from the fireworks display over Lake DeGray. Enjoy!

Itching & bitching!

OUCH!!

I got stung (or is it bit?) by a few dozen fire-ants yesterday. Immediately I put bleach on it- stopped the pain right away. But, today- they are all whelped up and MAN! do they ever burn and itch! Adding insult to injury- the majority of them are on my legs and wearing compression stockings over them is atrocious!

So... I'm NOT a HAPPY camper!

I was intrigued to discover the chemical composition of ant venom! Makes me wonder.. do those little guys have to pass chemistry in order to exercise their stingers? NO! So... since I didn't TAKE chemistry... and I certainly don't understand the "Asymmetric Induction via an Intramolecular Haloetherification Reaction of Chiral Ene Acetals" should I have to suffer?? HA!

Home remedies? Please send ASAP!

Happy Flag Day, G-mom's B-day and Valley Forge

It's Flag Day! Our nation has had this special symbol for almost the entirety of our nation's existence! THANKS, BETSY!

And... it's always easy to remember Grandmother Nancy's natal day because it's the same date! I wish she were here to celebrate it... we did certainly miss her and all of us shared special memories of her over supper.

Earlier in the day, Robin and I drove the eight DAR delegates to Hope for the Caddo district Flag Day meeting. While it was a lovely meeting, full of interesting historical presentations- it was the climate that got the most comment. It was FREEZING in the conference room at the Country Club. Even the women with hot-flashes were cold! A few smart little ladies keep afghans in their vehicles (obviously their husbands keep the thermostats on "snowflake") and they actually retreived those and we all wished we could huddle with them!

The photo is from when we got home. Mae of course hadn't gone with us- and the ribbons that we are proudly sporting weren't delivered until after we'd left (so disappointing!)! But we wanted a picture of three generations of "Daughters" and while it's against protocol- we pinned on the emblems and Dad snapped the shot. The ribbon I'm wearing is actually Mae's- she's never had one until today; but, she wants to share it with me- yeah! Mom's had hers (with Alexander Turrentine as the patriot) for a while. Robin's has the newly proven Ellis Cannon as the designated patriot on hers. While mine and Mae's also has Alexander for the ancestor bar- she is the first in our family to be eligible for the second bar as she's the only one with a supplemental line officially recognized. More explanation on that at another time!

Suffice it to say- some of the women that were in attendance at the conference had upto twenty ancestor bars. GOSH! That's a l-o-t of research!

At any rate-- celebrate being an American! And, fly your flag proudly!

Mack's Swell Car Was a Maxwell!

Country roads... take me home!

I've been going down memory lane a lot lately... seems only fitting that it should be in a vehicle of the appropriate age!

So... in honor of Grand-daddy- here is a 1910 Maxwell. This image is actually from a Revel model kit; but, will suffice until the actual 1908 model is restored and ready for pictures! I'm putting together quite a collection of photographs and articles dedicated to the project.

A few interesting tidbits about the Maxwell Motor Company.

It was started by Jonathon Dixon Maxwell. Would love to know the genealogy behind his middle name! Maybe I'll chase that rabbit later.

Maxwell automobiles were considered to be among the best racing machines of the era. In 1916, a Maxwell touring car set a coast-to-coast record, speeding from New Jersey to California in just ten days and sixteen hours!

One of the most famous non-owners was Jack Benny! While he and his sidekick, Rochester, routinely made reference to his old Maxwell; and it was often-time heard- it was actually Mel Blanc (the legendary voice of Bugs Bunny, etc) that made the engine sounds! In the comedy gag- tightfisted Benny would never "upgrade" his old jalopy and at one time during the War effort he contributed it to the scapmetal drive, thus creating a whole 'nother bogus myth. Many pilots would claim that their aircraft was sputtering or worse and blame it on Benny's Maxwell having been part of the recycled material in their craft until finally it had to be revealed on the show that it had never actually existed.

There was a popular song around the 1910's titled "Mack's Swell Car Was a Maxwell". I wish I had a copy of that sheet-music! Bet it's a delight! Or even better an Edison copy. haha.

One of the advertisements for it claims "only costs 29 cents a day to run this Maxwell 100 miles a week" WOW! Sure wish it were true today! I'm sure it's gonnaa cost a whole lot more than gasoline just to get it up and running!

But, for a labor of love- it'll be worth it. I just wish Grand-daddy were here to enjoy it.

Seventy three years ago...

My grandparents were married!

Mae's recollections of "the day" were that she wore a pale pink dress that she had embroidered large flowers on the netting. Pa was almost late to the ceremony because he had sent his suit to the cleaners and the lady that ran the boarding house had to track down the owner of the shop as they had closed early that day. They were married in the Methodist Church in Hope and drove that evening to Dallas in Pa's old model A. They were on their way to Austin TX to grad-school for the Summer... little did they know; but, my Mama would be born exactly 9.5 months later!

Mae and Pa (pictured here) on a much later vacation to one of their favorite Western destinations! Yellowstone and the Tetons.

Happiness! to June couples everywhere!

Moonriver

Yes! I've fallen in love with this tune AGAIN!
For the umpteenth time! I just can't seem to help myself!

I'm beginning to wonder if I'm being controlled by some weird moon-beam or somethang considering how I seem to keep having lunar thoughts! Oh! Duh! I get it... Sheer LUNACY!

Back to the topic: Mnozil Brass is an Austrian group. Phenomenal! I just wish they had more on iTunes!

Click here to go to the utube performance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkiZlL0YI0s&mode=related&search

And, for a truly FABULOUS cover of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody:
I just wish I knew the language to get all the jokes at the end!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBLm747tyn0&mode=related&search=

Perhaps it's the GROUP, though! They are just so uber-excellent! Oh!! And... in case you're wondering? Those are European instruments they are playing! A tad different than what we're accustomed! But, they sure do sound good!

Without further ado... to their site!
http://www.mnozilbrass.at/home.html?&L=1

All Propped Up and Nowhere to Go....

Tis the season after all! June.
The month for brides, beautiful landscapes and flowers!

And, if ya over-do it on either event- you're gonna pay the price. My expense in this? Three days minimum on the sofa. While my muscles and adrenaline are still at a high-peak - it's hard to make the brain slow down! I've just got so many ideas swirling around- why is it that levels of creativity and inspirations avalanche when the rest of the body can't participate? Thankfully- the lap-top has begun to work again and I can finally surf in some comfort! Can't edit photos from here- but, I can write. I'd much rather be playing artist with paint and ink, though!!

The reason for confinement this time? Though my yard desperately needs some hedge-trimming and I'd sworn that it was to be the next "big" project- a friend and a wedding took "the cake"- haha. I just hope the city doesn't decide to fine me for the overgrown privet.

This past weekend was the wedding of a young man (a class-mate of DS's). They are just 20 years old and beginning a new relationship- so young! I couldn't help but look at them and realize that we were at that same age when we were married. Just children! I just can't imagine our parents allowing us to do such a thing while still wet-behind-the-ears! Except of course, that it IS the idealism of youth and the natural progression of growing up (especially if you are Southern) and of a Judeo-Christiam background!

The groom is a personable young-man who has already experienced a lot of growing up during his few years. His parents divorced while he was very young and his mother died in a car accident before he was a teen. Since that time, he has lived here in AR with his grandparents. His bride is a lovely young-woman from a nearby town whom he met at a band contest four years ago and since then, he's only had eyes for her.

They are both very laid-back college students (think budget conscious)- their choices were very simple and they wanted to host the entire event themselves. Being that the best-man's mother, Kim, has been a mother-figure to the groom all these years; she chose to provide the reception food as her gift to the couple. She's very VERY good at hosting these types of events and her husband makes the most delicious of cakes! My part in all this? She's my dearest friend and I'm second best at reading her mind and able to do general flunkie work for the right price (free!). Besides- I have a soft spot for young couples!

Kim has spent hours mapping out, preparing lists and researching the most cost effective (and tasteful) recipes. I love being a guinna pig!! When it came time to set it all up- I figured it would take an hour or two to dress the tables (banquet and seating) and since so much of the food was pre-prepped; I just knew it was gonna be a "piece of cake"! I'm so glad I'm not the one who drew up the master-plan! I would have passed out if I'd actually known the estimated time of each activity required to prepare for an hour long reception! She truly could be an event-coordinator for any major entertainment venue!

We started Friday morning. The wedding was at 3 pm on Saturday afternoon. By 6 o'clock Saturday evening, I was TOAST! She tried to give me all the sit-down jobs there were, but I finally cried "uncle" and went directly to my grandmother.

I didn't see much of Mae (or my dog- thanks to some wonderful dog-sitters!) all weekend; but when it was finished... I had to go and thank her again for such a wonderful banquet she and her sister, Clarice, had made for us on our wedding day (almost 25 years ago). I remember knowing at the time that she'd stayed up all night the night before my wedding (it's a tradition in our family that the wedding dress is still being sewed upon until the very last minute!) but, I recalled too- of their tale about going to the grocery store at 3 AM for more chickens for chkn-salad cuz they were just sure they didn't have enough! Amazing to me that we even had markets that were open 24-hours back then or that she had the stamina and energy at that age! I most assuredly come from strong-stock!

Clarice or "Pargie" as our maiden-aunt was known to us- was very sick at this time with pancreatic cancer; she died just a few months later. One of the recollections of that particularly weekend was that she laughed aloud (like we'd not heard her do in months during the treatments) when my mil's friend, Johnnie, joined them in the kitchen while putting out the buffet. I get all weepy when I think of my Pargie- how she was suffering, how much she loved me and my groom (she thought he hung the moon!) and how she was a romantic at heart and wanted nothing but happiness for young-lovers. I'm a lot like her in all those respects!

My! How time flies and how life goes in circles.

To young-newlyweds and to the young-at-heart... may you have a lifetime of happiness.

And as so happens in life- along with the joy comes the saddness. Kim received a phone-call from one of her staff that one of the physical-therapists had been found dead (possibly from natural causes). The woman was our age and has two daughters (one a senior in high school and one a college student) that she has raised as a single-mother and loved gardening. She was well-liked by all her co-workers (this is the fourth recent death in the extended family of the department); her family and the staff need lots of prayers and uplifting.

Once in a Blue Moon

Tonight's moon is BLUE! and just WHAT does that mean??

Interestingly enough-- there is a mathematical equation for it!

once in a blue moon = 1.16699016 × 10-8 hertz

Go figure!

Another explanation is found here:

http://www.obliquity.com/astro/bluemoon.html

and.... http://science.nasa.gov/headlines/y2007/30may_bluemoon.htm?list61925

This photo is a false-color composite image of the Moon from 425,000 km



The image was created using 3 exposures through different filters. The exaggerated color helps determine surface composition (blue is titanium-rich, orange lower titanium, purple pyroclastic, red iron and titanium poor). Mare Tranquillitatis is the blue area at right, Oceanus Procellarum is the blue and orange area on the left, the 85 km diameter Tycho crater is at bottom center, and Copernicus crater is just above and left of the center of the image. The moon is 3,476 km in diameter and north is up. (Galileo, P-41491)

While the image isn't blue... it does offer a totally different view of our lunar companion.

While out walking the dog tonight- the moon was just rising through the last of the clouds from our recent rains. It was such a spectacular sight and I wished I could have photographed it myself! Since that wasn't happeneing- I decided to blog it instead! And, of course I have to research anything and everything first... so....

go ahead and google "blue moon" and discover as I did that the phrase "once in a blue moon" has several definitions; but, suffice it to mean "not very often". The most interesting thing I discovered was that it is possilbe for a year to have two blue moons! Not often- but, about every 19 years or so!

http://www.infoplease.com/spot/bluemoon1.html

After all these thoughts on the moon- "the man in the moon" naturally followed and natch I had to google that, too!
While I'll not bore you with the details of that search-- I will encourage you to find a copy of Reese Witherspoon's first movie "Man in the Moon"- a really Southern coming-of-age story that takes you back to an innocent era. It's one of those that I watch about once a month... it never occured to me that it might (or might not be) lunar tidal related!



Disclaimer: the spell-checker feature isn't working and I won't be held accountable for the typos! I can spell and if allowed to make all corrections orally, I'm sure I could compete in the Nat'l Spelling Bee... but, that's a whole 'nother blog!

In the beginning....

or how it all began!

Five years ago this month-- my dear friend, KH, begged (cajoled) and twisted my arm into attending a National Scrapbook Day event with her. "Bring a few pictures" she said. Now, by this time- I had been already resigned my graphic-arts job designing ads for the paper and freelancing for the Lady Tigers and knew that I much preffered web and digital lay-out to the paper format.

BOY! Did I ever have any idea where this would lead? NOPE!

The AR-scrappers challenge for this year's National Scrapbook Day was to revisit your first lay-out against your current work and see the changes! Oh, boy! I kept meaning to post it- duh. Anyway... without further ado....



Golly! That first lay-out could sure use some paint, ink and stamps- haha! S'cuse the quality of the image- I cheaped out and just took a photo rather than actually scanning the stuff. YU? I really did enjoy getting my very own trip down memory lane though! And, of course- "baby boy" is soooooo cute in those pics! Sheesh!

Too Punny!

Sorry-- I just couldn't resist these! I would have made them into signature lines... but, who has the time?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

* I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

* Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

* Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

* The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.

* To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

* When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

* A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

* A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.

* Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.

* We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

* When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.

* The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.

* The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

* The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

* If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

* A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

* A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

* The optometrist fell into his lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself. [That's a story that lens itself.]

* Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

* A backward poet writes inverse.

* In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

* A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

* With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

* Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A - flat miner.

* When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

* The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

* A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.

* You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

* He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

* A boiled egg is hard to beat.

* He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

* His parents thought he was a budding genius, but he turned out to be a blooming idiot.

* A plateau is a high form of flattery.

* Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

* When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

* When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

* Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

* Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

* Acupuncture: a jab well done

Laura Ingalls Wilder... quote & more

"Memories! We go through life collecting them whether we will or not . . . Let us make them carefully of all good things, rejoicing in the wonderful truth that while we are laying up for ourselves the very sweetest and best of happy memories, we are at the same time giving them to others."


- Laura Ingalls Wilder -

I have long been a fan and admirer of Laura I. Wilder. I still reread at least one of her books every year. My favorite? Well- the first of course! And, the "Big Winter" which I can only read during the Summertime as it makes me so cold!

One of my fondest desires is to take a "pilgrimage" to Laura & Almonzo's home at Mansfield MO, Rocky Ridge Farm. I'm hoping that the sisters will join me. Too- my dear friends, Kim & Doralisa, are also die-hard Laura fans. Perhaps we will all get to gather there and enjoy the stories that transcend the geographic distances of where we all grew up, but that unite us in girlhood!

Here's another link:
http://www.lauraingallswilderhome.com/

This month is the 75th anniversary of the publcation of Laura's first book. ENJOY!

Rune-Sore-Bees

I've written many times about how I love a good "Spoonerism" or "Monde-green".

Well..... here's yet another! Enjoy!


Rune-Sore-Bees
===============

Language proficiency is part of the international contracting
scene. This exchange between an English-speaking traveler and a
member of the hotel staff in a Far East hotel was recorded in
the Far-East Economic Review.


Room Service:
Morny. Rune-sore-bees.

Hotel Guest:
Oh, sorry. I thought I dialed Room Service.

Room Service:
Rye, rune-sore-bees. Morny. Djewish to odor sunteen?

Hotel Guest:
Uh... yes. I'd like some bacon and eggs.

Room Service:
Ow July den?

Hotel Guest:
What?
Room Service:
Aches. Ow July den? Pry, boy, pooch...?

Hotel Guest:
Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry. Scrambled please.

Room Service:
Ow July dee baycome? Crease?

Hotel Guest:
Crisp will be fine.

Room Service:
Hokay. An Santos?

Hotel Guest:
What?

Room Service:
Santos. July Santos?

Hotel Guest:
Ugh. I don't know... I don't think so.

Room Service:
No. Judo one toes?

Hotel Guest:
Look, I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what "judo
one toes" means. I'm sorry.

Room Service:
Toes! Toes! Why djew Don Juan toes? Ow bow cenglish mopping we
bother?

Hotel Guest:
English muffin! I've got it! You were saying toast! Fine.
An English muffin will be fine.

Room Service:
We bother?

Hotel Guest:
No. Just put the bother on the side.

Room Service:
Wad?

Hotel Guest:
I'm sorry. I meant butter. Butter on the side.

Room Service:
Copy?

Hotel Guest:
I feel terrible about this but...

Room Service:
Copy. Copy, tea, mill...

Hotel Guest:
Coffee! Yes, coffee please. And that's all.

Room Service:
One Minnie. Ass rune torino fee, strangle aches, crease
baycome, tossy cenglish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy.
Rye?

Hotel Guest:
Whatever you say.

Room Service:
Hokay. Tendjewberrymud.

The QUEEN! and other royalty.

For a long time, we have referred to my dear grandmother as "the Queen"!

She truly is a marvelous woman and has the dignity and grace that is the quintessential epitome of royalness.

Even though Mae's circumstances have changed so much of her world (i.e. the isolation that immediate hearing loss leaves one with); she has remained true to her character. She still tries to stay up to date with current events and when the conversation is one-on-one she offers insights and wisdom that are well-thought out. She keeps herself occupied and while she's frustrated with her lack of production- she doesn't dwell on it or make excuses.

The problems of adjusting our habits to accommodate her limitations have got to be frustrating to her. We so often forget to turn and speak to her directly- and oftentimes I realize it too late and the conversation has totally passed her by.

We had a guest yesterday that came to see all of us- but, particularly her. The seating arrangement in the living area has been carved out to accommodate her comfort- but, doesn't allow for the participants in a conversation to focus in her direction.. thus- the natural tendencies to focus lively dialogues in the direction of the ones participating in it leave her "out". I think we all realize it; but, remembering to turn aside and loudly emphasize a potent part of the conversation to her often disrupts the flow of speech and for this- I regret. There were several sweet little anecdotes that I'm sure she would enjoy and because she was actually physically there in the room (and we assumed that she heard them) when the guest left and one of us mentioned one of the stories- Mae was completely blank.

To her credit- she's not upset. But, it's so unfair.

Then... there's that other queen... Elizabeth.

Watched the newly released movie last night! What an eye-opener! I'd not read anything about the movie except that Helen MIrren had been awarded an Oscar for her portrayal. Didn't realize it was about "THAT WEEK" of Di's death. Lots of interesting perspective into the possible mindset of HRH.

Great movie. Great acting. GREAT scenery.

Also watched "The Last King of Scotland". The title alone intrigued me. Again, hadn't read anything more than Forrest Whitaker had won the Oscar. Very difficult to watch the graphic parts of this. Well made; but, I don't like watching psychos.

Think I'll have to watch something lighthearted and not near so thought provoking next! Hmmm.... "Night at the Museum"? That title appeals!

Random Rabbit Chasing

I need to exercise something awful! Both physically and mentally.

I'm healing (it seem so slowly!) but still have unexplained pain, fatigue and nausea. The nausea is the weirdest and most bothersome. The least bit of activity (especially the contortionist positions of putting on the compression stockings) seem to trigger it and some sort of dizziness. I don't know if it's from the gallbladder or the hyster- but, it sure puts a hiatus on participating in much "life".

The rib area pain still catches me off-guard; but, I'm more than accustomed to anticipating it and have an arm or pillow ready to press against it. I must look akin to Napoleon! Haha!

All this to say- I've got to do something to clear the cobwebs from the brain. I find that writing works! In reading over my journaling- it seems disjointed and jumps from topic to topic; but, that's the way I seem to be functioning these days. Thoughts are random and sometimes it takes great effort to "force" a complete thought without fluidly taking off in another direction. Now, why is this? My pain med is non-narcotic and I only take it late in the evening, I'll be glad when this hung-over feeling goes away.

One of the random thoughts that keeps repeating is Lady McBeth's quote: "Out, OUT, damned spot!" I was hopeful that I'd quit spotting within a few days of the surgery... alas- it can go on a few more weeks. Ugh. At least it's nothing like what it was even a month ago... imagine! I thought I was going to have to endure two immense menses a month for the rest of my life!

A pleasant diversion that one of the sisters left me is a whole bunch of slides that were discovered during the "great move". There are pics from Mae's trip to Mexico with cousins Sue & Ray; lots of Key--- family trips, Christmas holidays, birthdays and even some of my darling son that I'd never seen! Why the family always took slides rather than traditional pictures is beyond me-- but, at least we have technology to recover them... now... if I could only stay focused long enough to scan, edit and title them. By the time the scanner completes the task (and it's a newer scanner, but it still takes a couple of minutes) my brain has chased another rabbit and it may be a while before I complete the whole batch.

Have sat up too long for now. Must go recline. Thanks for the encouraging emails, friends! I leave you with a photo of me in a state of bliss! Dreaming of canoeing down the rapids! This is about as close as I dare get to them these days! Note the stylish cats-eye glasses! Doesn't my front yard look different!

Blasts from the Past...

This darling little image is from a music box that was a gift to our very dear Grandmother Nancy.

The tune it plays is Eidelveiss; a favorite that we sang together over and over.

But- the little girls were always representative of the three Key--- sisters. Though we were never that close in age- any time we found art that had three little girls featured- we always "claimed" it!

I'm happy to say that many years later- though we haven't always been geographically or emotionally close; when a crisis crops up... we are quick to make contact to reaasure one another and to reaffirm the appreciation and love we hold for each. This week- I have heard from both of them.... and I know that no matter how HARD and difficult our futures can be; we are in one another's corners.

So- I offer this comforting glimpse of beloved sisters. And, can only say that seeing both of them this past month (in real life) was not only physically healing but heart-warming as well.

Celebrate the shared moments and sisterizms.

Aloha, Don Ho....

Life is so coincidental and spontaneous. Earlier this weekend, Doralisa and I were talking about Hawaiian dialects spoken by her family who grew up on the Islands. My reference is of course, Don Ho- and I interjected that into our conversation.

I loved "Tiny Bubbles" growing up (among other songs) and remember fondly watching his specials growing up.

Tiny Bubbles

Tiny bubbles in the wine,
make me happy, make me feel fine,
tiny bubbles make me warm all over
with a feeling that I'm gonna love you 'til the end of time.

So here's to the golden moon,
and here's to the silver sea,
and mostly here's a toast to you and me

Tiny bubbles in the wine,
make me happy, make me feel fine,
tiny bubbles make me warm all over
with a feeling that I'm gonna love you 'til the end of time.

Tiny bubbles in the wine,
make me happy, make me feel fine,
tiny bubbles make me warm all over
with a feeling that I'm gonna love you 'til the end of time.

With a feeling that I'm gonna love you 'til the end of time.

Anyway- his death this weekend is poignant and coincidental to our conversation. Click on link above to read of him through yahoo.

Life's like that, I reckon. Anyway... aloha, Don.

ala Sallllllleeeee

Thanks to K.H for the avatar!

Real Answering Machine Messages

Some days... I just need something hysterical. Today must be one of those days. These are from mil, enjoy!

Real Answering Machine Messages
================================

WE ARE BORG. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED.
But we're not home right now. So leave a message at the tone, and we'll assimilate you later.

Hello, this is KVKE, you're on the air. (or) Hello, you're caller number nine!

This is the Literacy Self Test Hotline. After the tone, leave your name and number, and recite a sentence using today's vocabulary word. Today's word is "supercilious."

Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.

I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.

Thank you for calling the CSU Automated Hearing Test Line. Prepare for Test 1. Is this tone louder in your left ear or right ear? ... BEEP

(Rod Serling imitation:) You're dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world without time, where sound collides with color and shadows explode. You see a signpost up ahead -- this is no ordinary telephone answering device... You have reached, "The Twilight Phone".

Thank you for calling 434-2322. If you wish to speak to Tim, push 1 on your touch tone phone now. If you wish to speak to Lynn, push 2 on your touch tone phone now. If you have a wrong number, push 3 on your touch tone phone now. All of this button pushing doesn't do anything, but it is a good way to work off anger, and it makes us feel like we have a big time phone system.

Lucifer speaking. Who in hell do you want?

This is a test. This is a test of the Answering Machine Broadcast System. This is only a test.

(Recorded directly from AT&T:) We're sorry, but the number you dialed is disconnected or no longer in service.

Hi, you've reached 340-2359. We're not peeb eht retfa egassem ruoy evael esaelp os ,won thgir emoh. gnillac rof uoy knahT.

The number you have reached, 226-0477, has been changed. The new number is 226-0477. Please make a note of it.

You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of YOUR voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you.

(Klingon voice:) ANSWERING MACHINE. SPEAK.

You have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep.

Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I die before I wake, Remember to erase the tape.

Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.

A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So leave a message.

Hi. This is John. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

(Narrator's voice:) There Dale sits, reading a magazine. Suddenly the telephone rings! The bathroom explodes into a veritable maelstrom of toilet paper, with Dale in the middle of it, his arms windmilling at incredible speeds! Will he make it in time? Alas no, his valiant effort is in vain. The bell hath sounded. Thou must leave a message.

Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

I'm sorry, the number you have reached is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and dial again.

Factor V Leiden and the consequences....

Just what is Factor V Leiden (or FVL) and why am I writting about it now?

Visit the link above for "what" it is (in layman's terms). The reason I'm focusing on that today is because it explains some of what is going on with me. Not that I'm anxious to add yet another disease or illness to my ever-growing list.. but, had the test been around years ago and had I been tested- I might not be in quite the predicament I find myself in today.

For instance... I probably wouldn't have tried to bear children. I would have definetly found a different gyn to treat more agressively the female organs rather than believing the old rule of thumb "if it ain't broke-don't fix it" cuz it WAS broke and should have been out of there a long time ago.

I would have been on coumadin therapy for life after the first round of clots and the bum leg might not be in such bad shape.

I would have been a lot more astute about recognizing gall-bladder attacks for what they were. Yes- these may be related. Sister- go and get yourself checked NOW. If you need your g/b out- we'll do it together! Surely, the surgeon could offer a two-for-one special?? LOL!

I would have given more consideration to chasing dreams earlier in life rather than waiting til a more opportune time. Now that I have the time- I don't have the phsyical stamina or "shape" to chase them. Oh, well.

At least now- TODAY, I know. Finally. Definitevely. Without a doubt. I'm a FVL carrier/patient and hope that there aren't any other mutations to follow... problems with that mean that they cascade and cause certain other complications to other body parts. Joy.

Questions? Comments? Prayers? All of the above.

lorum ipsum dolor (sit amet)

"Neque porro quisquam est qui dolorem ipsum quia dolor sit amet, consectetur, adipisci velit..."

I was told I REALLY needed to say SOME thing... there, I've now said some.

Ciao.

The Wit & Wisdom of Benjamin Franklin

"When you're an Anvil, hold your sill, when you're a Hammer, strike your fill."

"William because his wife was something ill, uncertain in her health, indifferent still, h trn'd her out of doors, without reply: I ask'd if he that act could justif. In sickness and in health, says he, I am bound to keep her, when she's worse or better found, I'll take her in again, and now ou'll see, she'll quickly either mend or end, says he."

"Many princes sin with David, but few repent with him."

"To be intimate with a foolish Friend, is like oing to Bed with a Razor."

"You may sometimes be much in the wrong, in owning your being in the right."

"He is a Governor that governs his Passions, and he a Servant that serves them."

"Prodigality of Time produces Poverty of Mind as well as of Estate."

Oh, JOY! Oh, RAPTURE!

It's not the Canon Digi-Rebel I'd dreamed of... nope. BUT-- I feel like a whole person again! It's really hard being an artist without a pallet. So! I finally broke down and though I just couldn't commit to the one I really wanted- I did commit to something! Yeah!

Took it straight out of the box and had it flashing within moments of the battery going in! Ahhhh... I felt instant relief. As if I'd been panting for liquid and had just been doused! Of course- hadn't any superb subjects to snap, so just got chur basic cat and dog being petted by the Mr! Made Mom cheeze it up with me for a self-portrait.. showed her how easy it was to use. I think she wants one, too-- hint, hint- Daddy! I figure you'll want one, too- as it's so much quicker than our old outdated digi cameras that are only three years old! Imagine! Such speed and quality-- and as Byron was commenting: he'd paid $400 something for a top of the line 1.5 megapixel five or six years ago and had a real "Christmas story" fiasco and the last one available kind of story to go along with the present!

Anywhoo-- I'm in business again. I was commenting to Mom that thankfully- the old camera had died almost within hours of my departure from visiting friend, Doralisa- that was back in September! I've been THAT long without a lens! OUCH!

I feel almost like a human again-- no.. better! Am singing today! And, yes- I did go out really early and snapped a few pics of the heavy frost and the sunlight pouring into our old oak tree that was shedding leaves like a shower. Kinda pretty-- the bright orange glow and the leaf show. I'll hook everything up and post it later-- I'm off to dash off after more scenery!

~S

Melodius Morning!

OHMIGOSH. I'm just sooo behind the times.

While viewing a friend's blog (DL has a great blog! http://cyranogal.blogspot.com/) I realized that the "quote of the day" changed all by it's little self! Now, I'm not a really dummy.. I just act like one (somedays!) and had realized what a RSS feed was- but, hadn't thunk to put a clever QUOTE one (or something much more interesting than the weather stats) to use on a blog! DUH! Anyway.. I had to go the quote site.. and instantly found a lovely quote!

Music is the soundtrack of your life.
~Dick Clark

LOVED it! So appropriate! Now.. why didn't I think of that??

I guess that thought explains why I love my iPod so much! cuz... I can orchastrate my whole day with it! Set the mood! For instance.. I drove to LR yesterday in the Firebird and went shopping. It was definitely a bluesy kinda day! All Stevie Ray Vaughan, Louis Prima, Storeyville, Steve Winwood and Steve Miller Band. Uh..never though of it-- but, I have a lot of St's and Steve's there!

On my kind of date with dh-- if I had the chance to make a play-list (not happening with that strong-will!) it would include Michael Buble, Rod Stewart's Standards remakes, Frank Sinatra and Tony Bennett. Mmmm.. can't forget Harry Connick! Since I live in the real world-- and dh, has a very different set of taste- it would be a little Chicago, SRV, classic 70's rock selections and plenty of southern boogie.

Ahhh... the soundtrack of your life! That'd make a great title for a scrapbook page as well!

And since I posted this... another musical quote came my way... don't know whom to attribute it- but, it's good!

" Music is the only sensual pleasure without vice. "

Enjoy!

Brownie Points!

I received a clever e-card (a Nestlé chocolate one at that!) from my girlfriend, DL, this afternoon-- just had to join the website and they offer "brownie points" for submitting a baking memory... well.. that's not too hard!

This is what I immediately thought of--

One of my fondest childhood memories is learning to bake cookies under thetutelagee of my very dear great-aunt, Clarice, a spinster that we called Pargie... a toddler's version of "partner".

Pargie made the best cookies in the world- and when I married, the only thing I was any good at cooking was Toll-House cookies and a few other baked items. I didn't even know how to boil pasta for macaroni. My husband had to teach me that! I think he married me for my cookies!

I always think of my Pargie when I stir up a bowl; I live in the same house and bake in her old kitchen now and have taught my son nieces and nephews to appreciate a really good chocolate chip cookie! I know Pargie would be proud!

Go there.. join up.. spread some chocolate cheer and read the recipes... YUM!!

Down right dirty art....

... and NO! I'm not talking about porn!

Scott Wade is a graphic artist in Texas and has discovered a most unusal medium for his art. His car! after having driven it down his dusty road!

Gotta give the guy credit... he's a real down-to-earth kinda guy!

Link to his site (from my subject title above) to see lots more of his creations.

My favorites of course are the VanGoghs and the Vermeer... but, he has a lot of other masters and original art as well.

Enjoy!

Help me! Somebody help me!

Commercials. You either love 'em or you hate 'em.

I have a new one that I just laugh myself silly over (and have to imitate) every time I hear it! I even like it so much I learnt myself how to import it into a sound-mixer program and edit the darned thing down to just the funny part! How SICK is that?? LOL!

Oh! So you're wondering just WHICH TV advertisement I'm finding so amusing?? It's none other than the Geico commercial featuring Little Richard assisting (read that embellishing) an everyday consumer tell about her experience of having a traffic accident (on Thanksgiving Day, no less!) and the wonderful customer service she had from the insurance giant.

"WHOA! Look out! Look OUT! Help me! Somebody HELP ME! Mashed potatoes, gravy and cranberry sauce... wooooo-hooo--hoooo!"

What a HOOT!


As I was doing my search for the video- I discovered that Burt Bacherach had one, too... haven't seen that one yet (except on you-tube) and wasn't too impressed with that. The MB reviews I found on it weren't all that complimentary either. However... the Charro commercial was fairly well received, I like it, too- but, not on the scale that I like the Little Richard ditty. For the record.. the opinion seems split on the reviews about Lil' Richard, too-- but I like it! My Mama likes it! We get the giggles (pretty often) and when we REALLY get silly--- one or the other of us will spout off that phrase! It just seems the perfect exclamatory remark for so many situations!

Shopping on eBay and ya just sniped that lovely pewter plate you've been wanting? "Whoa! Mashed potatoes and gravy and cranberry sauce... wooooo-hooo-hoooo!"

Find a really great piece of kitchen equipment (like a food-scale! or something) on the Clearance aisle at Wal-Mart? "Whoa! Mashed potatoes and gravy and cranberry sauce... wooooo-hooo-hoooo!"

You trip over a new ancestor line that somebody just posted on Ancestory.com? "Whoa! Mashed potatoes and gravy and cranberry sauce... wooooo-hooo-hoooo!"

You can see just how useful this phrase can be? Oh my! I just get revved up typing it! I'm gonna have to go play my .aif file again! Good thing I've got it uploaded to iTunes... now I can intersperse it with my great rock-n-roll I've added this week!

"Whoa! Mashed potatoes and gravy and cranberry sauce... wooooo-hooo-hoooo!"

Enjoy your mashed potatoes! Oh.. and if you want my edited version.. just email me!

a Happy kind of Tired!

or... random thoughts from an exhausted scrap-mama that should be asleep right now!

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of joining several of the ARkansas Scrappers in Central Arkansas for a day trip of chit-chat, lunch and scrap-shopping! What FUN! And, now- I'm so keyed up I can't sleep! Being with friends is so invigorating! Putting my hands on new scrapbook papers has set the creative juices to flowing! Pictured above: Melissa (Mrs C), Ally & Rachel, Carol, Gladys, Sally, Wanda and Janet- thanks to Wanda for being our official photographer.

I've tossed and turned since around 2 o'clock with all kinds of ideas swirling! Ideas for themes for upcoming events: DAR (I'm the new Constitution Week co-ordinator); two State Swaps pages I've yet to finish; the Ferncliff retreat (can I even REMEMBER them now??); and of course- home decorating!

Oh, and before I forget it! I lost yet another 1.5 pounds this week-- and that was a surprise as I weighed-in at a totally different time of day (due to the parking nightmare thanks to Car Wars held at War Memorial Stadium). First of all- I've not been exercising much (cuz of the dratted leg/foot), and secondly because I ate prior to weigh; then there's always the fact that at different times of the day the body just fluctuates- so I was most pleasantly surprised to achieve this! The weight loss has slowed down in recent weeks; but, I'm still a LOSER and next will plan on breaking 75 pounds!! WHEW! What a relief!

Oh, and lunch was at one of the Hunan restaurants in NLR (and the little bit of veggies I snatched that weren't from the salad bar) were delicious! Mmmmhhhh! No fried foods- I just couldn't bring myself to do that yet. I've almost gotten this mind-set of an obsessed weight-conscious teenager.. I guess better late than never, right???

I had totally forgotten about FORTUNE COOKIES! Ahhh! Man- I miss junk carbs! Anyway-- friend, Gladys opened hers and decided I needed her fortune! Thanks, Gladys! It read: "You have a charming way with words and should write a book"! Well-- I love the word "charming" and I've read a few books.. does that apply?

Totally off the subject (but very near to my heart) is Sam and the other cats! Since Katrina has discovered "the great outdoors" and that she needn't be afraid of the DOOR to that wonderful world (or how to ask to get out and then back in again) she's gotten fiesty-er. She wallops poor old Samson when she comes back in- just pesters the bee-geebies outta him... poor Sam. But, he seems to have also accepted the newest outside-feline, "Tabby Tom", and when he comes in (which he LOVES to do!) he usually hunts up Sam and just hangs out with him! Odd cat-behavior for sure- but, I'm so glad that Sam seems to have "friends" in that weird cat kind of hierarchy.

Before I dozed off last night there was a special on TV about "Medical Mysteries" and one of the features was on these two young men that are both totally sightless but have developed "clicking" methods to allow them to triangulate (think sonar) sounds and judge what and where objects are. The really amazing thing was that they are so attuned to their surroundings that they could even determine the texture and type of building materials of new environments (such as a fence that was made of board fencing) rather than a brick structure from a distance of over six feet away. I mean to walk across a street and just by clicking the tongue and listening to the differences in how the sound returns and make path adjustments without falling down and tripping over obstacles is amazing! These two young men have never met, yet they both discovered the clicking methods on their own-- WOW!

I don't think Sam needs to "click".. but, he can sure identify a warm soft spot from a few yards away... he'd taken refuge earlier during the night (between me and Byron) when Katrina wanted to "rumble". He's followed me in here now and has claimed my lap and is purring almost loud enough that I need to turn up my iTunes.

Ah... this a happy kind of tired. Nat King Cole and Sam.

Is Life Nothing but a Numbers Game??

Somedays... perhaps!

Try this number on for size. One hundred eleven...

or- one hundred two *depending on the read-out you look at. Yup. You guessed correctly if you thought I was discussing the temperature! But, HERE? in ARKANSAS?? OUCH! That means with humidity factored in- it actually feels like 115 degrees out there!

*the higher figure was actually from the Weather Channel's site a few moments ago and the lower figure is because I could barely believe it and I ran to our handy-dandy outside thermometer that actually reads that figure and transmits it to me inside so I didn't have to go out the door again and actually feel it for myself! But- I have already today and I'm not going back out if I can help it! LOL!

If you guessed that I was meaning my weight-loss... well.. .that's another story.

Today's number from clinic is a ZERO.

No loss.. but, no gain either! This is the first time I've had a week with NO loss!

But, the encouraging number news is SIXTY-SIX. I'm still sixty-six pounds lighter than from where I started in January! So, all numbers aren't necessarily bad either in the great big scheme of things.

Here's another number for ya.... NINETY-SEVEN.

Yup! My grandmother, Mae, turns ninety-seven tomorrow! For someone that has seen an awful lot in her lifetime and relatively few personal illnesses- she's in remarkable shape! Except for today. She has a horrible sinus ailment that is causing fluid in her ears and she's having some vertigo. We had to cancel her "cousins" party in LR because of it- but, this afternoon she seems to be toughing it out (as is her typical character) and won't allow much help. We're all staying pretty close by in case she should get "tippy" and require anything.

Oh! Another number! TWENTY-FOUR!

That's the number of roses she received from a generous grand-daughter delivered by FedEx this morning from Hallmark Florists. And, MAN! They are GORGEOUS!

Another number coming up this week. TWENTY. Kid will turn two decades old on Monday.

That's all the numbers of interest I can think of right now.. must be the heat!

"A Real Woman Has..."

this list is from a recent book I read, "The Beach House" by Sally John, published by Harvest House Publishers.

The book follows four high-school chums as they reunite for their fortieth birthdays. They have all gone their different paths- and think that each are so different from where they had begun that they think that there is really no common denominator in their lives other than their past... it turns out that each has something in the way of life's wisdom to contribute to the other's circumstances as they are individually challenged in their current situation.

The list is from "Grandmere Babette" who tried to instill inspiration and encouragement in them as moldable young women.. they review the list as part of the storyline.

"A Real Woman Has..."

* A nest egg for personal use
* Something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour
* A youth she's content to leave behind
* A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, a hammer, and a black lace bra
* A black dress and a white silk blouse
* One friend who always makes her laugh
* And one who lets her cry
* A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family
* Eight matching plates, goblets, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored

"A Real Woman Knows..."
* How to fall in love
* How to quit a job
* How to cconfront a friend without ruining the friendship
* When to try harder... and when to walk away
* How to have a good time at a party she'd never choose to attend
* That she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents
* That her childhood may not have been perfect, but it's over
* How to live alone... even if she doesn't like it
* Whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally
* Where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen or a charming inn... when her soul needs soothing
* What she can and can't accomplish in a day, a month, a year

Six; Twenty-six point one

I'm melting, I'm melting!!

haha... no! It's NOT that hot here, YET! Though it was 80-something yesterday!!

I kinda like the numbers this week... and before you go thinking I'm meaning Racing Numbers... not those either! Though it is Oaklawn season and as "on top of the world" as I'm feeling I'm sure I'd be able to pick some good numbers!

I mean.... numbers accomplished.

For me- it's numbers shed. Lost. Left behind. Six pounds this week; Twenty-six total for six weeks.

My most serious EVER endeavor to deal with some serious health issues began on January 16, 2006. With the UAMS very successful Behaviour Modification program addressing weight loss, I'm making some strides towards a healthier lifestyle. I actually made the decision some months ago- but, the program dictated a start date in January. So... on January 10th, I weighed in a whopping 296 pounds. UGH. I've really had a struggle even admitting to that number. So there's a milestone in and of itself... that I can actually type that number (and not delete it!)

Purrfect Satisfaction....

As I was digging through pictures taken recently-- I ran across one that I almost didn't get!

The Kid doesn't come around very often these days-- too busy being himself! But on the occasion that he does- me having a camera handy and him be willing to allow it to be snapped are getting further and further between.

But, the sheer satisfaction on Jess's face after capturing (and subduing, somewhat!) Katrina Kat is priceless!

She, of course, is NOT pleased-- but, she did allow it long enough for this shot. Katrina came along after he'd moved on; so even though he IS the most feline intuitive person I've ever known (besides his daddy) she is extremely skittish around him. Heck! She's that way with us! It's also interesting to note that HIS cat, Samson, is close in attendance and just waiting for the chance to have that lap all to himself! It didn't take long!

Purrrrfectly Priceless!

Geocaching... the experience!

After a less than successful start the first day out caching-- the second day dawned bright and clear. Pop and I headed up the interstate towards LR-UAMS and I was fascinated watching the progression on the Magellan's road navigation system. I realized as we sailed past the rest stop where the cache resides there was a mark I'd not seen on the previous outing. Oh!! So- THAT'S WHAT it's supposed to "DO" when I get close! Well-- maybe I can figure this thing out!! We'd meant to drive past, btw, as I needed to meet class and then check into clinic before traipsing around after a cache!

On the return trip I was really pumped!! I was gonna find it! I was just sure of it! The minute we pulled into the rest stop I knew two things. One- that it was located at the end of the park and by deciphering the hint, I was gonna be "logging" this one! I took off; armed with the GPS and my cell phone (to call back and let him know I'd found it!). The closer I got- the larger it loomed on my screen (no, not really- but, it seemed to!) and as I was almost there realized I'd failed to bring the camera out of the truck. Called Dad to tell him to bring it- and lo and behold- he'd failed to put his phone ON him and was following in my tracks. Okay-- no biggie. No camera to capture it; but, he would help search! Yippee!! It was debatable whether or not I'd been able to pique his interest!

Soon I was within 20 feet and amongst the briars when I realized this is not going to be as easy as I thought! The leaves were so thick back here- I was just thankful it wasn't tick and snake season! I'm in a dress for pity's sake!! Neared 12 feet. 8 feet. 6 feet. Well- I'm almost that tall! If I were to fall in any direction I'd probably hit it with my head! Had to remind myself to LOOK at the terrain rather than the GPS screen. Hmm.... well.. nothing but a lot of leaves and logs. Okay... look for a pathway. There did seem to be two. By this time I've handed the unit over to Dad so I can actually give my full attention to looking for subtle clues.

Dad kept taking a step forward and then a step backward- then two sideways, turn 90 degrees and repeat. Do we call this the geo-dance?? I'd already done that! I'm walking around him-- peering. FINALLY I spy metal! Ahhh-- that's IT I squeal. Uhh... wrong. It's an abandoned traffic sign. Close but no cigar. I keep looking. Dad's not getting antsy, but, I know he's not gonna want to spend a whole lot of time here. Hmmm..... wait a minute! What's THAT??? Dad-- roll that log over! And, sure enough! There it is! How very clever! The log has been hollowed out to easily slip over an ammo-box and conceal it from weather and non-gamers.

There it was in all it's glory! My first cache find! It's marked "geocache" on the side-- I'm in heaven! There should even be a travel-bug in this one! At least according to the geocache site! And, there it is! A cute little bear and the "tags". There are some other trinkets besides the log book! I quickly remember that arghhh-- I'd forgotten to bring my item to trade. Oh, well! I could still sign the log-book and be a part of the game! Dad seemed to be excited for me-- and as we walked back to the parking area; he was concocting ideas for items that would be easy to construct and leave for future cache trips!

A big thanks to cachemates for their placement of the cache. And, to Dad for his patience and willingness to put up with this- yet another "lark" of mine! I so look forward to the next adventure!

Here are the coorindates for my very first cache:
N 34° 21.166
W 092° 53.377

Dad and I talked "baseline" and survey points the rest of the trip home. Surprisingly-- we'd had almost this same discussion last Fall when we were talking about America's migration and settlement. How the surveyor's first came when it was known as the Louisana Purchase and then again after the War of 1812 and made land-grants for compensation to soldiers and how our family had moved on account of this and several other reasons. Wouldn't the surveyor's be delighted to use a GPS these days! Which got me to wondering if our local surveyor used it- I chanced to meet a neighbor who used to work with our local office and he said that they didn't- yet! But- that eventually that all the little ones would be going that way, too.

Oddly enough-- the subject of jobs using GPS came up again this week as I was reading my former neighbor's (Miz Pat's) account of her g-son, Billy, particpating in a Job Shadow Day. He was assigned to the Arkansas Highway and Transportation Department Environmental Division crew walking transects in the Cache River area recording GPS readings and looking for evidence of the Ivory-Billed Woodpecker.

I've had a number of folks email me that this subject is fascinating but that they just don't "get it". Well-- me neither! I just know that I need to get "out" in order to get some exercise and marrying the "nerdy" gadgt part is just icing on the cake! I don't understand all the geek-speak on the geo-caching site; but, I'm having fun and I hope to have pictures from the next search. THAT"S the real appeal to me! If you want to join me on a site or suggest one- please feel free to leave an annonymous comment here or email me!

Top 20 Reasons that We’re Glad Our Sister is in Mexico on Vacation, and We’re Not Jealous of Her...

Top 20 Reasons
that we’re glad our sister is in Mexico on vacation
....and we’re not jealous of her...

(in no particular order)


20. Our dogs won't be mad at us for going away and having gone to a big body of water and playing with Frisbee without them; and our cats won't be mad for us going to a big sand-box without them.

19. We can flush toilet paper down our toilet.

18. We get to smell the aroma of wet dog coming in from out of the rain instead of the stench of sour bathing suits.

17. We get to remove our damp pantyhose and heels at the end of the day; instead of brushing the sand out from between our toes.

16- We get to hear people tell us, "You look tired this afternoon." instead of "You look tan and refreshed."

15- We don’t have to hide the key to our room safe in a strategic place in our bathing suit.

14- We don’t have to summon enough hot air to blow out the whole 41 candles on our birthday cake.

13- We can understand the conversation in the booth behind us while having dinner out without using our phrase book.

12- We can enjoy watching our trees and spring buds freeze and die without worrying over a hurricane.

11- Our sexy underwear wasn’t rifled through by the TSA at the airport.

10- We can enjoy a glass of tap water.

9- We can chip off fresh ice from the ice storm and add to our glass of tap water.

8- We enjoy the exercise provided by freezing our buns off while retrieving firewood, instead of a walk on the beach.

7- We can clean our own homes, and don’t have to tip for maid service.

6- We don’t have to use our lint rollers to clean the pet fur off of the suitcases to travel.

5- We didn’t have to go to Victoria’s Secret for new thongs, or shop for specialty underwear just to take a vacation.

4- We get to enjoy discussing business with our husbands instead of refreshing banter over a margarita.

3- We get lobster flavored soy and meal replacements instead of a freshly speared lobster plucked from the ocean.

2- We can gas our own cars in the cold wind with our money that we didn’t spend on underwear, to drive to work or run errands without paying for a taxi.

1- We don’t have ugly impressions on our backsides from being passed out in a hammock for too long.


from Sally & Nancy.... Happy Birthday ROBIN!!!

The Valentine's Day GPS launch!

Today, I was awoken at 6 AM with a lovely new Magellan Global Positing System from the Mr.

I was thrilled; and spent a good part of the day (after I woke back up around 10!) trying to get acclimated to the new unit. I'd never gotten all that familiar with the Garmin unit I'd borrowed; so, I've still got tons to learn in navigational tactics.

By about 2 o'clock; Mae and I had gone to visit the local Civil War Soldier Statue and documented it as Waypoint #2. Waypoint #1 being (of course!) HOME! Still not exactly sure what I'm doing.. but- at least I can accomplish that!

By about 5 o'clock- the dogs and I were ready to make our first venture to search for an actual cache. Not the wisest of decisions; going with no other company than the dogs (one of whom is not the best away from home or on a tandem leash).

Oh, well. We took to the Island Point trail at Lake DeGray.
After the first 1k feet I realized that there was NO WAY I was going to be able to:
a.) keep myself from falling down if I kept my eyes on the GPS screen;
b.) keep the dogs from wrapping themselves and me up in the leashes; and
c.) ever hope to finding the cache.

But- hey! We were OUT, on the trail headed towards the lake and the temperature was pleasant for walking!

I did finally decipher the clue given (with the co-ordinates) while trying to juggle the camera, the GPS, the map AND the leashes. How funny is this?? The clue reads: "I've fallen down and can't get up!" I was just hoping it wasn't prophetic!! Well- the clue gave me enough to look for; but, there were sooo many of them (downed trees) it could actually be and I still don't know the GPS well enough to actually allow it to direct my steps. I will give the dogs credit. Wrigley, especially, can follow a trail quite accurately and is pretty good at pacing. He and I have been walking together long enough that we can both anticipate one another's movements and he did his best to "lead" Sandy-dawg along to the edge of the lake without dragging me down the bank!

They enjoyed dipping their paws in and posed for a picture or two. Again, Wrigley knows just what is expect of him as my most willing photographic subject and I thanked him for it! We were a little too early to witness the sunset even though we passed a couple obviously on their way to the island point that would have just enough time to get settled in with their picnic to enjoy it. I started once to ask them if they were cachers but didn't want to hold them up.

Sandy-dawg was most relieved when she realized we were back at the car. I was relieved I'd not fallen down! Wrigs and I were both happy to drop her off at her house and get home to our comfy sofa and some dinner! Perhaps, I'll get some help in understanding the machine a little better and in the meantime, Dad has an extra lap-top I can use for caching and loading the GPS coordinates.

There is at least one cache on our way to UAMS tomorrow and there are TONS of them between here and Fayetteville when we take our trip this weekend! Dad isn't nearly as interested as I'd hoped he'd be; but, Kim's hubby, Sandy, does seem interested and they do like to hike- so I may have some trail-buddies after all.

Maybe I can even get Mr B himself interested enough to drag the canoe out and up a river to see what we can "see"! He was especially concerned that the GPS unit he purchased had two qualities... a.) it MUST be crash-worthy as I've not got the best record of staying on my feet or from dropping expensive electronic equipment and b.) water (and coffee!) proof! *Grin* He knows me only too well! All in all- a pleasurable day even though I didn't find my first cache! Maybe that's just as well! The dogs couldn't have taken pictures of it happening anyway!!

Coincidences abound!

For some time now, I've been noticing this "other" red Crown Victoria ('95 model) running around my lil' town.

Yesterday-- I was stunned to see it at the gas pump when I pulled in to gas up! I got out of my car and the young man looked up and all I could think of was... "nice car!" He grinned and said, "Yeah, yours too!"

As I was gassing up I wondered if his car had similar "issues" as mine. So- I asked him. "Hey! How many miles you got on yours"" and he replied that it was over 250k. Mine only has 183k or so; so there was a good chance that they did have the same transmission problems. I asked him that- and he said "Yeah! Like between 60 and 70 it shimmys!" Mine does that between 30 and 40 and apparently it's not uncommon with that year model.

He continued, "I have a '72 Chevy pickup; but, my dad gave me this when I was having to commute to Hope." How weird is that? My car is a recylce from my Dad to my sister and then to me! He said "We call mine the Grandpa car!" and yet again- I've referred to mine as the "Grandma car" ever since Scott N. made that comment driving home from the movies one night!

He looked at mine and said "Yours is looking a lot better than mine." It does and I was thinking that's because I've not let a teenager drive mine much! When he say "Nice meeting you- my name's Jesse Patch" I was so stunned! I asked "J-E-S-S-E?" and he nodded and I said that's my child's name!

Then, before he left he said "I'm the assistant manager at Pizza Hut, look me up when you come in there!" and I was so shocked! I live just around the corner from the Pizza Hut!

Life's like that! So many parallels. So many coincidences. They are fun and surprising when you've driven past them time and time again and finally have the opportunity to stop and just make casual exchange! And... it's more than pleasant when for a while I'd seen that car and seen the young men in their ski caps and thought they just looked like a bunch of young hooligans- only to find out they are just going to school and making a buck at the local pizza joint.

I love my hand-me-down sedan. It's a joy to drive and now it'll blink it's headlights at the "twin" car in town!

Turning a New Leaf

We humans hate change. I, myself- abhor changes. Most of them, anyway. I used to think I looked forward to changes- but, the older I become, the more I realize I prefer certain things certain ways and am unwilling to change them. That's not to say that I'd don't love a new operating system or a new hair-do.... I mean in the area of personal habits.

I DETEST the word: diet. Of all the dirty, filthy words in the English language- that ONE word is probably the word I resent hearing the most. I can watch an R-rated movie and nowadays (used to this wasn't the case) I don't even flinch when I hear the f-word. But-- the "D" word.... oh man! It sickens me, turns my guts and now it's a way of life I'm leading. How ironic.

I guess the first step to desensitizing myself to that word was saying it aloud and frequently in everyday conversation. Just like Elle's character using legal jargon in "Legally Blonde"! I still don't really appreciate the deeper meaning of the word calorie and how a calorie is the unit standardized to measure food energy. I mean.... a food item full of calories, such as a candy bar; should (and usually does) create a gigantic burst of energy. So if all things being equal in our little universe (recall the theory of for every action there's an equal and opposite reaction); then, WHY do our bodies STORE that energy rather than expending it immediately? Seems to me that if you "saved" it; it would lessen the amount of potential energy. But, NOOOO- if your body "saves" that energy it packs it into unwanted fat-packets and they do nothing but slow the rest of the energy levels down.

Oh, well-- that's all rhetoric and too bad that even the act of expending extra verbage doesn't do anything towards counting towards caloric output. So... it's off to the bike for me! I can hardly wait for the first two weeks to be over.. then, I can have some veggies again!

Whooooooo- Pig Soiieeeeee!!!

Yup! I'm going to go call the Hogs!

The Razorbacks sports teams have been a part of my life since day one! That would be because when I was born- my folks were in the music program there... and... if you have a ball game of any type- then you also have a band! I was born during basketball season- but, that doesn't seem to have mattered much. I like just about any athletic event that they participate in.

Our house was a mere block away from the athletic center. We even park in my old "yard" when we go back for games. Why! We even had our very own personal football field in the backyard! Okay-- it was Fayetteville High School's (at that time) but- I thought everybody grew up watching the big boys knock one another down and the band practicing drill after drill in preparation for the "BAND GAME!"... yeah- I know! But, for a long time- I thought that the whole reason they played football was to introduce the band and then to lead them out.

Anyway-- as an adult- I've never been to a Razorback BB game. Been to a couple of football games (even been to see them play in the Cotton Bowl stadium!)... but, mostly have watched them on TV or listened on the radio. I've seen a few of the individual Razorbacks play and have had the pleasure of meeting the great Sidney Moncrief and getting his autograph... took my kid, too! But... haven't had the pleasure of sitting in what is now called "Bud Walton Arena".

Until THIS year that is! Yeeehaaawwwww! On Feb 18th (one day before my dsister's 41st birthday!) I'm going to see the boys in RED play Florida! Should be a really good game, too- Florida's ranked pretty well this year- fifth as of the current standings. I don't really have any idea what Stan Heath has in mind cuz as of today- the Hogs have a lot to prove. So, I'd GUESS he's got a LOT on his mind! I sure hope that this is a better year than the last few. Too- I'm just as glad that I'm going when I DO get to finally see them play- it's not under the leadership of Nolan Richardson. Stan's presence has been a breath of fresh air- though it has yet to materialize into any winning streaks.

All in all, though- I'm not exactly sure what to expect... I sure look forward to calling the Hogs again!

Whooooo, Pig SOOOIEEEEE!

How DOES he do it??? and why I smell so "fresh" this morning...

Sam cat that is??

I have rearranged a couple of rooms recently. One even more than three times thus far! Yeah. I know.. I just can't seem to quiet get it right. Anyway- Samson (blind man) ALWAYS finds a "path" from and through all the newly arranged stuffs (mostly my electronic peripherals), traverses them WITHOUT slipping off and successfully ducks and feints his way over to me. AMAZING! Considering that they aren't in the same order every time- and he's going by touch I really don't know how he does it. But- he does.

And, at first I was typing all alone with a clear unimpeded view of the monitor and then.... da-DAH... I have a lovely orange fur-embellished keyboard and am barely able to see around his Orangeness.

Been a busy critter morning anyway. Stayed up late, late, late last night reading a lovely new novel by Tracy Chavalier, "The Lady and the Unicorn" (she also wrote "Girl with Pearl Earring". Anyhoo- as I was trying my darndest to get my feet comfortable under the cover of cats.. I realized that there were THREE felines on my feet and one dog perched in the crook of my knees. How and WHEN had that happened?? Guess I was so intrigued with the story that I failed to even realize that they were there. But- there they were. And, Sam and Miss Katarina were picture posed! There they slept- belly to belly!! She has really charmed the big boys!

After having returned from morning coffee with Mae- to my newly arranged studio (I made SURE I got a larger window view and LIGHT- yes LIGHT!) realized that my favorite woodpecker and cardinal were out there demanding food. So. Back out the door to feed the birds. Black (the larger of our two outside cats) saw me and proceeded to call to me after I'd gone back in. Couldn't stand that for long; so, opened the door to call him up and in when all of a SUDDEN Katrina darted out the door, down the steps and over to nuzzle on Black! Oh, MAN! I'll NEVER get her in, I thought! Sure enough- she thwarted his plans on coming inside and I couldn't get close enough to her to even have a chance of grabbing one of those last fleeting tail hairs. Goodness! What WAS I gonna do??

Got "smart" and thought of tuna fish. It's what "B" had used to entice her royalness the first time he ever captured her... maybe it would work for me this time! Au, contraire! Fugghedaboutit. Little scamp raced from bush to bush and back and forth underneath the stairs, but- still nowhere close enough to me to even get the opportunity to entice her with that lovely smell. She just wasnt' HAVING it! Finally- after about 20 minutes... Sandy Dawg (from next door) makes an unexpected appearance and barks- shrilly! Oh NO! This has just gone from bad to worse! She worries an worries at the very sight of that kitten and that kitten ALWAYS disappears when she hears Sandy! Quickly-- I race to Sandy and practicality drag her up the steps and have to shove her through all my indoor animals that are gathered anxiously at the door. This is turning into a major comedy of errors and I'm not in a mood to laugh yet-- haven't had NEAR ENOUGH COFFEE!!

I ended up sitting on the steps and dipping my finger into the tuna juice over and over and mewing back and forth with Katrina. To make it that much more interesting... the woodpecker is chattering and chattering to his buddies and they are flying in- seeing me, squawking and flapping off! FINALLY after about 30 minutes of this pursuit- she calls to me one last time and races past me and the bowl of tuna up the steps and is CLEARLY wanting to go back inside! DUH! Now HOW would I have known THAT might happen?? I grabbed her as she made her way past me- almost tipping the tuna all over my robe and quickly got her inside past the THRONG (two cats and two BIG dogs!) now gathered in the doorway. Thinking she and the inside cats would like that tuna now... set it down and lo and behold! They all had to have a little "love" session on Baby Girl Katrina! Rubbing noses and scampering around... no interest whatsoever in the tuna. ARGH- but, I smell quite the fishmonger's wife this morning.. and I have my inside cats in, the outside cats out- Wrigley finally asleep on my sofa and sent Sandy home to her Mama (who hadn't even realized that SHE was outside this morning!)....

I'm off to take a shower and remove the aroma. The two beloved cats are at either end of my desk settling down for their naps, FINALLY! I think I may be able to at least have a shower in peace!

Happy eve to New Year's EVE to you!

Code Blue is NOT a term for a good sale....

{ This is an actual account from January 2005, see STORY ORIGINS below. }

Well, you never know what kind of trouble Kim and I can get into.

We can find it when it's not even looking for us. Or, it can sneak up behind us and spook us and we'll just laugh! Which is pretty much the way it happened tonight-- but, I thot I'd give some of you a little insight when you hear the words: "Associates, Code Blue. All associates - this is Code Blue."

Kim and I went to our favorite store, you know the name... starts with a Wal and ends with a Mart. Being the week after Christmas we were sure to get some good markdowns-- and they might have put out new craft goodies in the craft section. Besides- we needed a little retail therapy-- as we'd not seen each other all week. Scrap Stuff. Scrap Organizer Stuff. Scrap Stuff that Some Knuckle-head had Hidden and We Just Uncovered Stuff. We'd been dutifully grabbing and comparing, flinging and filling our buggy for about an hour - when the announcement was made. Now, Kim- (being in the medical field) looked authoritatively at me and said "that means somebody's not breathing or the heart has stopped". So, we really didn't pay much heed. Too, we knew that it being New Year's night past 10 pm- that it probably wasn't a Blue Light Special kind of announcement. But, it really didn't mean anything significant to us.

We wandered a little further down the next aisle of Christmas mark-downs. Kim and I are savvy customers-- we've learned the best hours for shopping without having a lot of crazed consumers crowding the action alleys. We've been shopping this time of day (or night as it were) for quite a while- gathering up all kinds of bargains and over-looked treasures. Why! She'd even found an indoor basketball hoop for her son- and it wasn't even misshapen; the perfect new stand for her Christmas gift- a new scanner/printer. New (to us) beads and wire jewelry supplies that would work just GREAT on a new lay-out. We were just on the third aisle of the really good stuff-- the 75% clearance of holiday flotsam jetsam when the second broadcast was made.

This time it was a little shriller-- and stated that "Everyone needs to find the nearest exit and leave the store immediately. Associates Code Blue- to the nearest exit." We took the "Everyone" to mean us this time and began towards the checkouts. We'd not gotten past Health and Beauty Aids before we saw folks at the opposite end of the store running towards the exit. Uhhh... the two exits that were nearest us were both locked for the night and there was a law woman bearing towards us. She took one look at our overflowing basket and said "You need to leave that right there- there's a problem with the electrical wiring and when it's fixed you can come back and check out your buggy". Oh. Okay. Fine. Sounds good to me. No big-a-deal.

The closer we get to the exit- the associates are chattering amongst themselves. But, they aren't saying anything really legible and the kids in front of us are giggling and wondering if the alarms will go off if the wiring is really messed up. By this time- I've got a pretty sneaky suspicion that it's not a wiring problem and since the weather isn't really stormy- it's probably got to be a threat of some other kind. For one thing- by the time we get out the doors- there's no fire trucks around. Just the sheriffs deputy's. So, I ask casually to no one in particular- "should I move my car?" and one of the fleeing associates replies "Yes, you need to get to the very end of the parking lot". Uhh.. sure seems a little more ominous than an electrical problem to me. And, where ARE the firetrucks?? Shouldn't they be heard by now, they are only a mere five blocks away.

Well, Kim and I wound our way out of the parking lot around the pedestrians and refugeed across the street in the Dollar Tree parking lot. We tried our best to overhear what the associates were talking about- but, they are too far away. Since we're thirsty- we head over to McDonalds to get some refreshments- besides... there's a better vantage point from there! When we got to the cashier- we asked if they knew what was going on over next door and the guy just said- "Oh, yeah- they had a bomb threat." Now, we couldn't just LEAVE! We might miss something truly worth scrapping! I mean-- there's sheriff's deputies and police cars; but, still- NO FIRE TRUCKS! If I ran the zoo- I'd be sure and have them at least sitting there to put out even a hint of a whisp of smoke--I mean-- there's a lot of investment there! Kim and I together had at least 2 hours of effort poured into that one lone buggy! We waited 45 minutes before the firetrucks finally showed up. They still weren't letting any of the late night shoppers in the doors- but, did allow them to drive AROUND the barricades at the parking lot entrances. Can you say.. "Duh? WHY?"

I think it's because Kim and I had found the very BEST of the markdowns and some creep wanted it for themselves, called in the threat and is waiting til they open the doors back and is going to go and grab our loaded buggy over by register number 18. RATS. So much for our late night- blue-light specials bargain hunting. We can give you a blow-by-blow description of how the police-lady rode on the hood of the police car when they exited the building. That's what happens in small rural town when there's nothing open but the Super Center and it has a little "excitement".

Just thot you'd want to know.

Oh... and we never heard of any explosions or arrests since then. Guess everybody's A-ok. If you see somebody casing a loaded buggy with craft supplies and clearance goodies, tho-- get a license number for us. We may just have to pay 'em a visit.

{ STORY ORIGINS } This is an true and actual event that occurred on New Year's Eve Night of 2005.

{ DISCLAIMER } All persons portrayed are as real as humanly possible; no animals were hurt or damaged in the events relayed. I most sincerely do hope that it will never happen to you... and if it does- make sure and put your name and phone number on the buggy for later retrieval. Republished in the spirit of hilarity. Warranty is null and void if UPC symbol is damaged or marred. Not responsible for any injuries incurred while reading the above narrative. Comments welcome. This product expires when mold reaches a one inch thickness or it is determined that the product may have been contaminated by the presence of sludge, mildew or actual BS. In case of fire, break glass. Children should not try this at home. NOT AUTHORIZED for sale or rental outside the USA and Canada. Bonus material not rated or close-captioned. Distributed with symbol and trademarks representative of the author within the permission of The Queen, Her Royalness Katatrina of the Siamese. Images in mirror may be closer than they appear. Using an arm in the upright position may or may not indicate the intention to make a left hand turn- use blinkers when at all possible. Quantities limited. All sales final. Not intended for human consumption. A good rule of thumb is to use the index. Potable water is not available at this time- please see attendant for specific instructions. Did you leave your comments yet? Some things are better left unsaid... for all others shouting may be necessary. A legal document of authentification may be required for genuine purposes. Great balls of fire, good golly Miss Molly. If at first you don't succeed- try, try again. Crime doesn't pay. Keep off the grass. Are you still with me here? Then, please accept my apologies and have a Happy New Year. Baking soda makes an excellent cleanser for counter tops, laundry and teeth. The use of baking soda may actually increase sodium levels in certain instances. Care must be given in the event of a natural or unnatural disasters. I love you MIL. You, too- sisters and SIL2B. The provisions of this warranty give you specific legal rights and you may have other rights which vary from state to state. READ AND SAVE THESE INSTRUCTIONS. Read all instructions before using device. For Household Use Only. No serviceable parts inside. Do not attempt to service this product. CAUTION: Always use feeder and pusher, keeping item gently pressed against guide. For safety and protection push ON/OFF button. Ha ha. Caught you. Would you please tell my son and my brother I love them as well? Do not allow cord to hang over edge of table or counter or touch hot surfaces. Avoid contacting moving parts. Never feed food by hand. To protect against risk of electrical shock, do not put power unit in water or other liquid. Some critics say that the way to man's heart is through his stomach-- I say it's a skoal can. Can this go on forever? NO. Just say NO. It's noon- do you know where your children are? A stitch in time saves nine. Nine what? Shake gently before each use. Store upright at 20 to 25 degree Celsius or 66 to 77 degrees Fahrenheit. Do not freeze. Protect from light. Read all instructions before use.

The week be"faux" Christmas....

... all through the house,
not a creature was stirring,
not even a souse.

The stockings, though "hole-y"
hung on the mantle with care-
two dogs sit by the hearth,
shedding all kinds of hair.

The Head Granny of all
bundled in scarf and warm quilts
waits patiently for family
to don their new kilts.

The chief cook 'n bottlewasher
ponders recipes and book
for something spectacular
to taste and to cook.

She also commands
the decorating crew
rehanging lights
both colored and blue.

Her tree though quite slim
has nutcrackers and a star
angels and birds
but no boughs on thar!

The family has high hopes
that Santa will bring
not only gifts in shiny boxes
but gifts screaming "BLING"!

Be sure and ask my dear Mama what kind of "rocks" Santa brought her this year!!

Title inspiration credits go to: Nan!
Grinch paradoy a lame tribute to Dr 'Theodore Geisel' Seuss.